Besides the violin or perhaps classical piano, singing arguably has the most mystique surrounding how “difficult” it is to learn. This is perhaps one of the biggest fallacies in all of music education. Nothing could be further from the truth. Learning to sing isn’t the problem; the fact is, we all sing!
We most likely were emitting sing-song vocalizations before we can even remember, and sang along with our mothers or to cartoons as a toddler. And the majority of us have bellowed along with the radio or campfire sing-along at some point in our lives, whether or not we admit it. Or in the implausible instance that we never did, well then we could have, and still can.
The reason for this is laughably simple: it’s easy! All humans have a natural sense of pitch. Starting as small children we learned to recognize the inflection of our parents voices, because the pitch (before the words became familiar) determined mood, or approval versus reprimand.
99% of adults in society can hum or sing along with the happy birthday song, and most probably have many times.
So, the problem isn’t that you “don’t know how to sing”, it is simply that you have bought into the story that you are “just not a real singer”. This separation between “messing around” and “real singing” goes back to the societal divide between performer and audience, that began over 100 years ago in American culture with the advent of recorded music.
Somehow, in our national psyche, we took on the belief the singing around the campfire was inferior to opera, or church choir. Or that “professional” singers were better than the rest of us. We became relegated to mere Audience, and saw ourselves as different, and inferior, to the “stars” of the stage.
It’s all in our mind.
The problem with most of us who want to reclaim singing into our lives is not lack of ability, it’s just too much self-consciousness!
This sense of being overly concerned with what others may think of us limits our enjoyment of life in so many ways. It would take an entire separate chapter to analyze the reasons we feel this way, but some of the common causes are lack of self confidence, social trauma, ego, and conditioning from our childhood.
But whatever the cause, the results are the same: we are limited in our expression because of fear. Fear of “not being good enough”, or “sounding bad” and “bothering others”.
Fear of failure. Perhaps even fear of success.
While all of these fears are ultimately not helpful, and largely self created, we still need to be understanding and patient with ourselves as we work to heal these issues.
Upon closer examination, it becomes clear that the trigger for our self-consciousness is usually the presence of others. If there’s no one around to hear us, most of us are far less inhibited. Who cares what we sound like, there’s nobody there to laugh at us!
With this in mind, we will explore some ways you can free up the singer within you…
5 ways to start singing more:
1) The car and the shower: your best friends
If we can find situations where we are alone, on a recurring basis, these can be great opportunities for exploring our voice. The best environment is undoubtedly our automobiles. Not only do we use them regularly, and often alone, but we can also play music to sing along to! Our cars are like mobile practice studios, where we can make all the awful noises we want and never have to worry about being heard!
We’ve all heard the phrase “shower singer”, and although often not quite as private as the car, if you can get in the habit of singing while you bathe (or perform any household chore for that matter), you will be rewarded.
2) Sing-Alongs: strength in numbers
The best way to get over the fear of singing in front of others is to sing with others. And we don’t mean a formal choir or “band”. Perhaps later in life, but for now that’s too serious. We mean a silly, messy and possibly inebriated song-along. Someplace where you don’t stand out at all, and can bellow along to your hearts content. Any wrong notes will be lost in the cacophony, and besides the level of fun is high enough where “mistakes” are merely laughed at and forgotten. Whether camping, at the bar or during holidays, don’t turn down the opportunity to dive in whenever the singing starts.
3) Power of make-believe: karaoke and concerts
Speaking of bars, although not necessarily the healthiest environment to hone your skills, if there is a karaoke machine involved much can be gained. Due to the general silliness of this hobby, as well as the “liquid courage” available, karaoke is actually one of the best ways to get more comfortable with your singing. It is not a bad idea to organize a group to do this with, and even make a list of your favorite songs. Over time you will notice that you are hitting more notes correctly, and most importantly, having more fun!
And when you make it to a concert (assuming it;s not a sit-down classical show), make sure to sing along with the performer for the parts you know. Rock, country or pop concerts are usually loud enough to where you won’t be noticed. And if you are, who cares, right?
4) Uke can do it! Learning an accompaniment instrument
Although the voice is capable of being awesome all on its own, taking up an (easy!) instrument to accompany yourself with is a great idea. Among the reasons for this are: it diffuses the focus from just your voice, which can be frustrating at times. it serves as a wonderful reference point for learning to sing “in tune”, which is really one of the most important elements of improving your voice. (for example, playing a note in yr instrument of choice, and then trying to sing that note). And, it creates a gateway to such wonderful activities as open mics, jam sessions and camping strum-alongs. Just be sure t pick something simple (unlike the french horn), and to learn in a fun and “non-serious” way. The ukulele or a small keyboard is recommended.
5) The “right way” to study voice
Unfortunately many of us are actually damaged by conventional voice lessons. This sounds like a harsh statement, but statistics unfortunately prove this. This is largely due to the fact the most voice teachers focus on technique (“diaphragm control”, exercises, etc) before letting the student learn actual songs. This is fine if you are going into singing as a career or our bent on making American Idol, but for the large majority of us this approach is just a turn off. The trick is to just start singing. And that means singing along with songs you enjoy. Don’t worry about how you sound or if you are “hitting all the right notes”. Just sing along and remember to breath now and then.
If you do want to take it up a notch and get voice lessons, please make sure to find a teacher who is fun, and will listen to your goals. it is OK to learn about the theory and technique of singing, but just never let it get in the way of your having FUN…
